The secret to a happy marriage is that there is no secret.  All I know in regard to ‘happy marriage’ is my own experience. 

In my own experience, I find that the more time I spend in prayer and in the Word of God - the more I appreciate my wife, and this appreciation too, is a gift from God.

 

This should not be surprising.  After all, if we are listening to the Holy Spirit, then we understand the grace and the blessings that God has bestowed on us all the more.  We also have more insight into his purpose for our lives and our marriages.  It is also true, that when we are hearing the Holy Spirit we become more aware of our place in God’s plan.  It becomes more obvious how undeserving we are, and all the more amazing that he has shown us such great love.  This makes it much easier to then pass on that love to others, especially our own wives.

 

God has given me a great gift - a wife.  “He who finds a wife has found what is good and receives favour from the Lord”.  I have truly received favour from the Lord beyond anything that I deserve.  He has given me a faithful wife.  She is my life long companion and best friend.  How can I be ungrateful when He has given me so much?  After 37 years of marriage, I am still overcome by my wife’s beauty.  This too is a gift from God.  When I look at her, I see everything that we have endured together.  I see everything that God has given to me through her.  I see our children and I see the happy moments that we have shared.   Is any of this a secret?  Not at all, this is all God’s blessing, and it is simply obvious to me that I do not deserve any of it.  

 

Even as I am writing this, I am overwhelmed by God’s unbounded love for me.  My eyes are welling up with tears.  How could I not be grateful for the gift he has given me in my wife?  How could I even consider hating him in return by contemplating something that he hates? (Not that I want to contemplate it).   “‘I hate divorce’, says the Lord God of Israel.”  (Mal. 2:16)

I am truly happy in my marriage.  This is because of God’s love for me, and I do not think that is a secret.